Is it Tuesday Already?
Funny thing about these Tuesday Confessions; none of you are surprised by anything I write.
There is no shock and awe . What can I conclude from that? A; I'm seriously boring B; I talk about myself way too much and you've heard all my stories or C; I'm crazy and capable of anything so nothing is shocking anymore
Which is it?
Ok, this weeks confessions... something old and something new.
When I was 8, I set our backyard on fire. My 3 best friends were boys and our favourite game was Fireman. My stepfather smoked cigarettes so I would steal his matches before sneaking out to play . Me and my friends would set a small fire with sticks, pass around the toy red fire helmet and whoever wore it had to drop their pants and pee on the fire. We'd done it so many times before we never once thought of it possibly being dangerous until the day I couldn't pee. Yep, thats right. The flame is growing and growing and there I am squating, trying to pee and I can't. The boys see the flames grow so they try and pee. By then, they are so scared they can't pee either. We panic. We almost run until one of the boys reminds us that the whole backyard is gonna go up if we don't put this fire out. We start stomping like crazy and finally, it goes out but not before leaving a 6x6 foot burn circle. I tried to cover it up with leaves and branches but no cigar. Years later I can appreciate the irony of getting spanked with one of the sticks I was going to set fire to at a later date.
I take a bath every night. It's how I wind down. I take a bath and smoke a joint. I'm habitual
with both. One thing you may not know...The last thing I do before I get out of the tub is pee.
It's my little secret rebellion.
There is no shock and awe . What can I conclude from that? A; I'm seriously boring B; I talk about myself way too much and you've heard all my stories or C; I'm crazy and capable of anything so nothing is shocking anymore
Which is it?
Ok, this weeks confessions... something old and something new.
When I was 8, I set our backyard on fire. My 3 best friends were boys and our favourite game was Fireman. My stepfather smoked cigarettes so I would steal his matches before sneaking out to play . Me and my friends would set a small fire with sticks, pass around the toy red fire helmet and whoever wore it had to drop their pants and pee on the fire. We'd done it so many times before we never once thought of it possibly being dangerous until the day I couldn't pee. Yep, thats right. The flame is growing and growing and there I am squating, trying to pee and I can't. The boys see the flames grow so they try and pee. By then, they are so scared they can't pee either. We panic. We almost run until one of the boys reminds us that the whole backyard is gonna go up if we don't put this fire out. We start stomping like crazy and finally, it goes out but not before leaving a 6x6 foot burn circle. I tried to cover it up with leaves and branches but no cigar. Years later I can appreciate the irony of getting spanked with one of the sticks I was going to set fire to at a later date.
I take a bath every night. It's how I wind down. I take a bath and smoke a joint. I'm habitual
with both. One thing you may not know...The last thing I do before I get out of the tub is pee.
It's my little secret rebellion.
posted by Sandi at 7:21 PM
5 Comments:
Ok question. I can see how the boys put out the fire. But having daughters and being familiar with the...unpredictability of it...how did you pee on the fire without burning your ass????
Dude. These boys were 8 too. How big do you think their 'hoses' were anyway? It wasn't much different from my junk. We just pushed our hips forward and let 'er rip.
Oh baloney. Even boys with small boy junk still "project". LOL
Wait one minute !
I've got a 4-yr old daughter who would love to write her name in the snow if I would let her; so girls putting out fires comes as no great shocker to me.
Taking a leak in the bathtub?
That's an act that could begin hours of conversation.
Craig,
Time for me to meet this princess ;)
How much talktime could you squeeze from that topic? One hour? Two?
Anything more than three and someones gonna call you a fetishist.
Are you in town the 28th or 29th of Dec by chance?
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