The Phone Call
Ring Ring
A younger man answers, lots of teenage chatter in the background
" Hello asshole. Enjoy the movie last Tuesday?"
Dead silence
Who is This?
" You should know. You have my ID"
I have no idea who you are or what you're talking about
" Well, I have a credit card receipt that says differently"
Huh?
" Yeah, Isn't that fucking classic? What kind of idiot uses a stolen credit card to call his buddy and invite him to a movie paid for by that stolen credit card"
What credit card?
"MY credit card you fuck"
Whispers in the background..muffled
Well, I have lots of friends calling me. I have no idea
" uh huh. If I were you, I'd hang up the phone and kick the shit out of your friend for implicating you in a crime"
How did you find me..I mean how are you calling me before the Police???
"The marvels of new age technology . Ain't it grand? I know everything about you.
Where you live, where you work, your name, your age. Its quite amazing really"
This is harrassment
" Laughing... Oh Baby, you don't know harrassment. Once I've called you at home in the middle of the night 5, 10 times THEN it's harrassment. Then again, what are you going to do? Call the Police? I think not"
This isn't funny. You ruined my whole weekend.
" My heart bleeds. You ruined my week when you ripped me off. Now, its my turn. You weren't too bright though. Using a stolen card at a gas station where everyone KNOWS there are cameras. Using a stolen credit card at a movie theatre where the cameras are in plain view. I have footage from the theatre, nice and clear. When I'm finished with you, the police are getting it, but not yet"
What do you want? Why are you doing this
" Because I can. Because you ripped off the wrong fucking person. Because there were things in that wallet that were of no value to you but they were of enormous value to me." Thats why. Watch your back. You never know where I'll be
Hangs Up
I can't imagine how he was feeling. Having the lady you ripped off calling you on the phone. I wish I could have seen his facial expressions. I will.I'm not done yet. I have one more plan. I'm going to have someone call him Monday. This is so and so from the Police Dept. Your number has shown up on a stolen credit card receipt and although not a suspect at this time, we'd like to ask some
questions. Please come to the station at such and such address for 2 pm
I can see it now. He'll show up, ask for the officer who doesn't exist. Then what?
He's stuck. He can't say anything. He can't tell the officer why he's really there.
His pants are down and he'll have to do some quick thinking on the spot. Of course I'll be close by observing with utter delight.
A younger man answers, lots of teenage chatter in the background
" Hello asshole. Enjoy the movie last Tuesday?"
Dead silence
Who is This?
" You should know. You have my ID"
I have no idea who you are or what you're talking about
" Well, I have a credit card receipt that says differently"
Huh?
" Yeah, Isn't that fucking classic? What kind of idiot uses a stolen credit card to call his buddy and invite him to a movie paid for by that stolen credit card"
What credit card?
"MY credit card you fuck"
Whispers in the background..muffled
Well, I have lots of friends calling me. I have no idea
" uh huh. If I were you, I'd hang up the phone and kick the shit out of your friend for implicating you in a crime"
How did you find me..I mean how are you calling me before the Police???
"The marvels of new age technology . Ain't it grand? I know everything about you.
Where you live, where you work, your name, your age. Its quite amazing really"
This is harrassment
" Laughing... Oh Baby, you don't know harrassment. Once I've called you at home in the middle of the night 5, 10 times THEN it's harrassment. Then again, what are you going to do? Call the Police? I think not"
This isn't funny. You ruined my whole weekend.
" My heart bleeds. You ruined my week when you ripped me off. Now, its my turn. You weren't too bright though. Using a stolen card at a gas station where everyone KNOWS there are cameras. Using a stolen credit card at a movie theatre where the cameras are in plain view. I have footage from the theatre, nice and clear. When I'm finished with you, the police are getting it, but not yet"
What do you want? Why are you doing this
" Because I can. Because you ripped off the wrong fucking person. Because there were things in that wallet that were of no value to you but they were of enormous value to me." Thats why. Watch your back. You never know where I'll be
Hangs Up
I can't imagine how he was feeling. Having the lady you ripped off calling you on the phone. I wish I could have seen his facial expressions. I will.I'm not done yet. I have one more plan. I'm going to have someone call him Monday. This is so and so from the Police Dept. Your number has shown up on a stolen credit card receipt and although not a suspect at this time, we'd like to ask some
questions. Please come to the station at such and such address for 2 pm
I can see it now. He'll show up, ask for the officer who doesn't exist. Then what?
He's stuck. He can't say anything. He can't tell the officer why he's really there.
His pants are down and he'll have to do some quick thinking on the spot. Of course I'll be close by observing with utter delight.
posted by Sandi at 4:46 PM
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